Girls Talk at Starbucks

Dear stranger,

After I spent 24 hours on the bed with Mr Grey, I decided to breathe some fresh hair, so I went out for dinner and had some girls time at Starbucks. This topic has been repeatedly discussed over and over again about the 'attached' groups trying to match someone for the 'single ladies'. I mean admit it, not being so harsh or try to offends anyone, but there is no eligible bachelor around (not for me or others to be frank). It is kinda weird when someone asked you what kind of partner you want and you answered it 'I dont know'. No one knows for sure what God has chose for you the other half but still you can make an endless list about things you hoped for. I asked myself, I don't have any preference as well but I do know what I want from my partner - at least a few things I think guy should have, not from the material point  it is more to values, principal, personality and character. I am not that shallow, you know. Unconsciously, maybe I built some standard for the guy I wish to establish my future relationship with, after the failed relationship - I had learned. I set my benchmark quite high now. I don't date anyone but I still welcoming people as friend.

I am kinda bored with the topic tho. I left to made a phone call to wish my dear friend Happy Birthday and caught myself giggling and laughing over the jokes he threw at me. I miss him, I miss how we used to laugh over the same things and all the jokes we had. When I was back at the lounge seat again, we left that boring topic behind and let's talk about the newlywed, maybe it is kinda taboo or very embarrassing to open up and discuss about sex matters with your friends - girls or guys, uhmm it is just an Asian thingy, sometimes being open and feel less uncomfortable towards those taboo topic makes your life much more easier, in a sense things are easier when you have somewhat Western lifestyle where everything is more open and straight forward. We talking about it awkwardly in public, Starbucks is a public place maybe no one hears us but some of our words might be caught by some ears, who cares any way. I enjoy the girls companion but quite shocked with their thoughts about sex and relationship. Something about Asian culture, they never agreed for a couple to live together before marriage, after the marriage they found 101 things that they didnt know about the partners. It has a good and bad point to be fair, good point is: you know you are making a right decision and aware of some unexceptional behaviour of your partner - trying to digest and adapting to it. bad point it: if you have been together for few years, you had big arguments or maybe explode and your partner can't take it, that is the end of it, because there is no stronger bound of marriage to anchor the relationship.

Inside my heart I whispered, I think those girls need to read Fifty Shades of Grey. Mr Grey will teach them everything he knows.

Talking about those stuff made my mind wandering bit to far. Being brought up by different people at different places have shaped me and let me have advantage of having a little mixture of everything, with all my background I have developed some kind of disorder, I am not sure in good or bad way but my adolescent time is not normal like most of girls, it sculptured what I am now and I am more aware and open to a lot of things. Things I can accept or if I can't I will chose to leave it.

There are good points about Western lifestyle where you are more independent, open minded and straight forward. The relationship between family is not that as complicated as Asian people - which most of the time I like the Western thinking. I like the idea of we are individual that have life and have choice, our parents don't own us and we do not owe anyone or born to please anyone. Also, they appreciate human as a human, as someone that need life, privacy and time off from work. Not like in Asia where all the people are working like slave and yet never been appreciated.

We are a grown up adult, we filter every new information, keep in mind what we think is right and ignore what we think doesn't suit our principal, we dont just yes to everything. Everyone has their own values and principals, it defines someone in everything they do - work, family, friends, relationship and it also effecting the next generation - how are you going to bring up your kids. So if you are not ready to be a parents and guide your kids with the right value and principal, so don't be a parents or you will an irresponsible arse who produce a lot of irresponsible kids in future.

I mean it.

xxx